Category Archives: Creative Processes

Dream On?

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Tuesday, January 20th, 2015 -( -5°c / +23°F & cloudy @11:30 am in Atlantic Canada )-

— My head’s on fire. Two hours ago I sat down in here to add last night’s dreams to the ‘dream jernil’ here and I noticed a problem with one of my pages. I think I fixed that problem, but discovered two or three more.

— But, if I don’t drop that and get on with this, it will never get done.

— And I should probably mention the fact that before I thought I should write down what I can remember of those dreams, I was going to sit down and see how far I could get with the next chapter of my ‘1963’ novel.

— You can see how far I got with that.

grumble grumble

— Dreams: Both of the dreams I remember a lot of details from were long dreams in a stable dream world. More like a visit to an alternate reality than something I made up that could fluctuate and change the physics of its universe at the snap of a finger.

— Dream One: This was sort of a Vampire world. Vampires were coming to my home there, starving, because humans had suddenly developed the ability to burn Vampires with Spiritual fire at will. Starving because the alternative was much worse. They were trying to become human again. I didn’t have the secret they needed on how to to become human again, but I did have immense unconscious power to protect myself and anybody else in my house. When one vampire decided to give in to his hunger and tried to attack me it was like the world’s most powerful bunsen burner ignited and a firestorm of white light exploded from behind me and flowed upward through and around me with power and force that I found astounding. It slammed the vampire up against the ceiling and burned him to ashes quicker than I could have stopped it if I wanted to. I woke up wondering why I was dreaming about Vampires.

— Dream Two: I was in New Zealand. I’m not sure how I knew I was in New Zealand, but I knew I was in New Zealand. I was an adult visitor to a school for young children. It looked like a small school where the grades were grouped together, like first and second grades in one fairly large room, third and fourth in another, fifth and sixth in a third, and seventh and eighth in the last class room. I think they were having some kind of team building play time. I think the lowest four grades -first to fourth- were in the same room with their teachers asking the kids for ideas while steering them toward ideas that were supposed to be important to this game. I thought it was a bit on the heavy handed side with the teachers pretending to be asking their questions, but leading the whole game, almost manipulating it. I heard that the kids had chosen “Star Wars” as their theme and had to build teams with as much diversity as possible. No team could be all athletic stars, or all the smartest kids, or the best artists or the most sensitive, or anything like that. The teams had to be set up so the kids would learn to appreciate that the weirdest kids in the school might have hidden talents that could save the day and help them win their game. The point wasn’t to win the most points, or finish the fastest, all kinds of tasks had their own problems and solutions. There were physical games where it wasn’t the guy who kicked the ball the farthest scored the most points, but where they had to kick a ball to each member of their group and then run to another spot to receive a kick and pass the ball on to the next person. The idea was to hit all four corners of the field, were goals were set up, collect a flag from each corner and then get back to where that game started. Then they all went inside and had to help each other solve puzzles. I didn’t quite get why they included all the different types of games they were playing, some of it seemed like a complete waste of time and energy to me. I did understand that the teachers were implimenting some kind of agenda that was supposed to make it obvious to all the kids that they were all basically equal, and somebody who isn’t the best athlete would be a whole lot better than the best athlete at some other important part of life.  — I did like running around and kicking balls and then sitting down and trying to guess what the point of the next puzzle might be.

— And here we are. I got up around seven a.m. and it is now after 2 pm, and I pretty much got almost nothing accomplished so far.

— Shrug–,

~~~~~ Jim

 

 

Later on in the day

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The old man shuffles where the young man used to run

His eyes see the same world he saw as a child

But a lot has changed

Many details look the same

But a sandy area near a river where he used to play

lies now, half neglected and half fenced off and ‘improved’ with over priced houses

and distrusting owners glaring out through locked doors and windows armed with burglar alarms

The books he loved reading more than once now require a pair of glasses to reveal their coded secrets

Anywhere he looks, any memory he peers through is now weighted with years of random association with pleasure and pain

memories strained through love and loss, anger and forgiveness, harsh words and encouragement

Words like ‘forever’ and ‘betrayal’ fill with nectar and poison, sting and soothe

Wrinkled old women still look like the first time he saw them, softened by years of warm touch, celebration and consolation-

clarity, confusion, they’re all still there, you never forget.

Some things you never get over – some tears still burn.

The loss of a pet, the cruelty of a ‘friend’. The death of a child or a childhood companion.

Loves that turn sour can be survive – Loves that never were – cannot

And yet a rainy day can still bring back the sunshine

And dreams left unfulfilled can still inspire

While promises unkept can still burn deeply

as the pain in his joints can be ignored with a hint of a wagging tail

or the memory of a purring cat

whether ‘ghosts’ or ‘souls reborn’ are real, they are still with him and always will be

And now hints from the next life shock less and less

While messages from long gone parents, friends and lovers

feel more convincing every day.

Contact from beyond the grave, much harder to deny,

Leaves this tearful poem without an ending.

 

~~~~~ Jim Wellington – 19 January, 2015

Saturday, January 17, 2015

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Saturday, January 17th, 2015  -( -15°C / +5°F @ 5:45 pm in Atlantic Canada )-

Boof & Hubbudah

Cathi and Jassper on the porch, January 5th, 2015.

Moe

Moe, looking strange as ever on the chair in Cathi’s ‘Zen Corner’

So yesterday the prognastifications of Half Past Human dot com had me worried and today there are way too many photos of dead children in Gaza on the twitter feeds. What else? I don’t know – I was almost feeling okay before, now I ache all over. It feels like a Sunday, like tomorrow will get here too soon and force me to get up and do something that I know will kill me slowly. But that’s just plain weird.

I spent part of Wednesday or Thursday feeling like something was attacking my emotional state of mind. I went back to bed and meditated there. I became swamped with ideas for the novel that I haven’t been able to get back to for a couple weeks. I wanted to get beyond that at connect with God in person. I fell asleep instead. Sounds like a standup comedian’s routine. But I woke up feeling refreshed, like a veil had been lifted. I don’t feel like the veil is back, but I feel like I’ve been pushed into a corner and locked in place there. Not as easy as, ‘I painted myself into a corner’- more like some kind of malicious force forced me into a corner and won’t let me move.

—ehh? So Dreams: Yes, I had dreams, I dreamed I was writing something. That’s all I can remember right now. So when I got up and began trying to write the next chapter to my 1963 novel it took me over an hour to open a new ‘document’ and give it a title. And then get two paragraphs done and then got called away to do a couple other things that absolutely had to be done. I remember Doreen Virtue telling us in 2007 or 8 that Michael the Archangel had told her that there was nothing wrong with the economy and as soon as people realized that, the phony recession would go away.Now we’re being manipulated into believing the economy is going to crash and we’ll all be in constant danger. But I’m thinking the real danger is the people behind every government on this planet. Or they believe they’re behind every government on this planet. Pulling strings, controlling us? They are full of it, but as long as too many of our contemporaries believe the b.s. propaganda we are bombarded with every day, the whole planet is being pushed into a mind numbing depression.

And now something is going radically nutsy with Firefox on my laptop. I can’t get any windows to move. they’re locked in place. That’s never happened before. This is the new version 35.0

— Anyway, whatever the evil vibrations are that are bombarding us, I have to go try to deal with them, or meditate my way around them.

— I did manage to write 2 plus maybe an eighth pages. Now I hurt and better go deal with that.

— Have a Nice Life– 

~~~~~Jim